All collages, comments and videos from Johnny Moronic

Here’s another look at an American movie, this time a 1994 epic set on Easter Island, with a whole bunch of Maori actors from New Zealand. Finally, a widescreen HD Bluray of the movie has been released, and as I predicted in the previous update, it looks far better than the very ordinary fullscreen, with no less nudity. Rapa Nui does not spend a lot of time on the female roles, but when it does picture the women, they are always showing their breasts and wear very little clothing. I’ve also made a couple of collages of Sandrine Holt plus an extensive collection of caps from the movie which in some ways better expresses the nudity in the movie than the videos.

Johnny’s HD caps and videos are here.

She reminds me of a younger Salma Hayek.

The redhead in the background is Rébecca Balestra.

The 2017 theatrical piece Provocation (often styled as Pro|vocation), which involved Swiss actress Piera Bellato, was performed in French. The production was a collaboration between the director Árpád Schilling and students from the La Manufacture – Haute école des arts de la scène in the French-speaking part of Switzerland. Here is the entire play, but there are no subtitles.

I guess she hasn’t done any nudity, but there is lots of bikini material floating around, and she looks just as good as you imagine.

This horror/thriller, filmed about a year before Fast Times, was Jennifer’s first nude scene, and her first credited film appearance of any kind. She was 19. She’s 64 now, and still working tirelessly, perhaps more than ever.

A news anchorwoman begins to suspect that a man living in her apartment complex is the serial killer that’s been raping and killing women in the Miami area.

Video

Micro-budget horror film.

Plagued by psychic visions, a woman begins manifesting a monster inside her bedroom closet. It grows stronger, dragging her childhood trauma to the surface, forcing her to confront her past. She must face the monster or be consumed by it.

I think I was trolled by this film. The image quality is about like my dad’s old 8MM home movies. The editing is hilariously bad (several seconds of a close-up of a tree with no significance to the plot, e.g.) The sound is filled with hum, scratching and crackling. The lead actress delivers her lines like a second-grader reading from a primer. The two shower scenes go on forever, and seem nearly identical. There’s not much narrative and no scares.

The entire film runs about 44 minutes. It has about 9 minutes of fake trailers at the beginning and 10 minutes of end credits. It has additional footage from different films that the lead actress is watching on TV, and it has about two minutes of her showering. That means the alleged story, such as it is, runs about 22 minutes.

I thought “No film can be this bad,” but after a few minutes I finally got it through my thick skull that I needed to add the phrase “unless it’s on purpose.” I finally came to the conclusion that the film is some kind of inside joke, and I’m not in on it. I guess it’s sort of like “Creature from the Haunted Sea” without the witty voice-over.

Ya got me, dudes!

Good one. (I guess)

Videos

I can see it now, maybe, but not until somebody else ID’d her.

This girl was the winner of Masterchef season 5 back in 2014 . She was a stripper before that. Lots of info about her in the video.

As the good lord intended.

I suppose the Almighty did indeed show his approval, as Mexico emerged with a 2-0 victory.

Semi-related: Iran plays today in the USA. I wonder how the crowd will react to them.

I stated a couple of weeks ago that the see-thru championship belt had to belong either to Charlotte Lawrence or Brooks Nader

I completely forgot about Lily Allen!

Here is her latest: