Category: Knowledge

To honor the Crusader legacy, just call him Peter the Lyin’-Hearted.

In another demonstration that facts and satire have become indistinguishable, this is real, not from The Onion.

Every day, on bended knee, with your family, in your schools, in your churches in the name of Jesus Christ.

I’m not very religious, so I am assuming Jesus was a huge war guy, who always preached destruction and vengeance, and asserted that your faith and your government are inseparable.

In yet another example of the ever-increasing irrelevance of irony, it appears that Fox News is actually being inspired by The Onion. There was an Onion story last week about how MAGA nation was happy about the high gas prices, was hoping they would go even higher, and even gave a little extra to the gas stations to show their patriotism. Just a few days later, the MAGA media hive actually started trying to convince us that high gas prices were our patriotic duty, and the sacrifice we have to make for our nation, a la gas rationing in WW2.

I’ve forgotten Das Kapital from my college days, but I assume that only dirty commies want average people to be able to afford gas.

Unfortunately, the British don’t follow the same traditions as the Czechs, and the nobles will not be defenestrated (literally thrown out of the windows of government buildings).

Europe needs to revitalize some of these ancient traditions. Prince Andrew was apparently sharing state secrets with the famous pervert Jeffrey Epstein. That seems sufficiently treasonous for a beheading.

In all of history, which leader amassed the most followers in his own lifetime, from scratch (meaning voluntary followers who were not inherited from ancestors or predecessors)?

Muhammad had about 100,000 followers when he died, about one of every 2,000 people on Earth.

Genghis Khan’s number of VOLUNTARY followers is indeterminate. He controlled millions, but he had no more than 250,000 in his armies, placing him in the same general category as Muhammad – about one for every 1600 on Earth

Darius the Great had an army of some 250,000 men way back in 500 BC, about one for every 400 people on Earth.

Kim Il-sung had about 22 million followers when he died in 1994, about one for every 260 people on the planet.

Hitler’s Nazi party had about nine million members, approximately one out of every 246 people on the planet.

Chairman Mao had about 30 million followers when he died in 1976, about one out of every 140 people on Earth.

As one commenter noted, Gandhi had as many as 300 million Indians willing to die, unarmed if necessary, if he led the charge. They were true believers, and he created his movement from scratch, ticking off all the boxes. That’s about one out of every eight people on earth at the time. How could I have forgotten him? I don’t know whether any leader can ever get to that level again. If you include him in the discussion, it’s like discussing relief pitchers, in the sense that you can debate about who was the second-best, but the top spot is occupied.

The population of Earth is almost exactly double what it was when Mao died in 1976, so Trump needs about 61 million true believers to beat Mao for second place. He may have done that. Between MAGA cultists and his die-hard fans in right-wing groups outside the USA, he may, in fact, have 61 million cultists who would be OK with him shooting Paul McCartney or some other universally beloved figure in Times Square.

Donald Trump may, in fact, be the second-most successful leader in history by that definition.

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Do you amateur and professional historians have other examples?

She’s been busy!

It’s about time they brought her to justice! That’s the third 7-Eleven she robbed this week. It’s a shame for her, though. You need to rob four before you get the free Slurpee.

This was an especially bad one, because she pistol-whipped the assistant manager. Then, even worse, she forced him to eat four taquitos from the roller grill.

I believe we can all sleep a little easier now that she has been captured.

Or we could, except that they already released her, because I made all that up. It was a DUI arrest.

Britney deactivated her Instagram account after this arrest, but she had just enough time to sneak in a nipple!

Note that the picture with the red censorship heart has a clear see-thru of the other nipple!

Video here