Category: Beauty

Dutch made-for-TV dramedy from the Dutch equivalent of PBS.

Ines is a woman in her late twenties who calls herself a poet, and is constantly being reminded that she has not entered the real, adult world. Her roommate and best friend: a steady boyfriend, a job in a gallery, friends who make adult choices. Ines has nothing, except a lot of sex. She has never been loved, only wanted, and when the latter is gone, there is nothing left. Her life needs a new direction. Can she ever become an adult without sacrificing what makes her unique?

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Screwball youthploitation comedy

The girlfriend of a dweeb is sent away to a Catholic girls’ boarding school by her uptight Dad (Burt Ward) in order to protect her from amorous advances. Rounding up support from his faithful friends, the dipshit sets out to free his girl (Tracy Dali) from the hell of imposed celibacy.

Virgin High featured topless scream queens and Burt Ward. In other words, it had everything a movie really needs, as this trailer demonstrates:

They don’t make trailers like that any more, do they?

Oh, sure, this is a totally dumb (3.7 at IMDb) movie, but dammit, I miss the 80s and 90s, when they made totally dumb movies on purpose, as the good lord intended.

If only MAGA stood for Make America Goofy Again.

Johnny Moronic’s film clips are here

Coming-of-age dramedy from Argentina. It has not been widely circulated, judging from the small number of votes and reviews at IMDb.

Vera, in between school and volleyball classes, rents out an empty flat to teenagers looking for a place to have sex. Her scheme to make money develops into the discovery of her own sexual desires.

Videos

I don’t really know anything about the porn biz, and I’m not usually interested, but this looks like it might be kinda fun:

Once Upon A Time In The Valley recently premiered on Wicked, and is set in the glittery, cutthroat world of the Los Angeles adult entertainment industry!
Stunning and busty redhead Sinatra Monroe stars as “Red” in the first episode, “Welcome To The Valley.”

Sample captures here.

Charlotte at the ELLE’s Women in Music dinner in NYC at the end of May

Full gallery

Italian giallo. Original title: “Perché quelle strane gocce di sangue sul corpo di Jennifer?” The Italians seem to love their long titles. The literal translation is “Why are those strange drops of blood on Jennifer’s body?” I think Bergman made entire films where fewer words were spoken. ¹

Having recently escaped the clutches of her ex-husband’s sex cult, a beautiful model is stalked by a masked killer whose previous victims include the former occupants of her new apartment.

Aesthete just did some new 1080HD videos from this film.

And as you would expect, Tuna was all over this film in his day:

Edwige Fenech is a nudity legend. She was the queen of two exploitation genres: commedia sexy all’italiana and giallo (sexy, violent pulp thrillers). I haven’t tried to count her career total of nude scenes, but I’m guessing it is 50 or more, which may be a record for non-porn actresses. She is still around, still acting from time to time, and still looks great. (She was 74 in this video.)

Footnote 1: I have previously recounted my experiences watching American movies with subtitles when I lived in Europe.

In going from English to Norwegian, some cowboy would say something like “You boys circle around and cut them varmints off at Danger Pass. The rest of you – follow me and we’ll cover their rear.” That would be translated into Norwegian as “Kom.” (I didn’t make that up. I can’t remember the sheriff’s precise verbiage, but I got it as close as I could. It was at least two long, complex directions that were translated as “Kom.”)

Meanwhile, in Italy … A person would say something like “maybe,” and the Italian subtitles would fill the screen, then continue to the next page, covering in detail all the various reasons why the speaker could not give a definitive “yes” or “no.”

I was always curious what it would be like to watch an Italian movie with Norwegian sub-titles, with the Norwegian translator skipping all the fluff and covering only the bare essentials, as is their wont. I imagine it like this:

First sub-title, ten minutes in:

Grevinnen er død (“The countess is dead”)

Next, and final subtitle, two minutes before the end, as the police inspector gathers the suspects:

Morderen var deg, oberst. (“The killer was you, Colonel”)

Spanish drama. Marketed in English as “The Story of Us.”

The plot explores a ten-year relationship, starting from its end. They fell in love, lived an illusion, had children, tried hard not to give up, and fell several times.

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If you’re into granny-fuckin’, she would either be the top choice or close to it.

Full gallery here

There is a mirror image behind her, and she may not be wearing pants.