Author: Scoop

The Bad Boy Mowers Gasparilla Bowl?

Scoop, ... no comments.

“A 6-6 Ohio vs. a 7-5 Nevada — two programs with virtually nothing in common — is essentially the poster child for the idea that there are too many bowl games.”

Best name (given that there is no Ty-D Bowl, inexplicably): Bad Boy Mowers Gasparilla Bowl.

When I was a fresh-faced lad, mankind had almost nothing: no cable TV and no streaming computers or phones. We would sit by the telegraph with our hungover, racist uncles on New Year’s Day and listen for the short and long clicks that brought us news from the faraway Rose, Cotton, Sugar and Orange Bowls. Aunt Elsie would bring us body temperature milk she had just squeezed out of ol’ Bossy, and regale us with tales of how she had once seen the real Orange Bowl in a black and white postcard. Uncle Florian would take out his squeezebox and play some tunes for a private halftime show, often after he had emptied a pint of hooch into his glass of milk. It was difficult for them to teach us the proper racist attitudes toward “negroes” and “DPs,” because they only had a few minutes on a single day to impart all of their wisdom, so they had to hold on to our sleeves and continue to mumble drunkenly as we stood in the doorway and tried to take our leave.

Today I can conveniently pass down that racism at a leisurely pace to my own nephews during 40 bowls on several weekends. It’s truly a tribute to mankind’s eternal progress.

Quite a night for Lamar Jackson

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Not only did he toss five TDs with only 23 pass attempts, but he also broke the single-season rushing record for a QB. He’s leading the NFL quarterbacks in both rushing yardage and passing TDs, and he’s leading ALL backs in rushing yards per carry. There are four running backs who have gained more rushing yards than Jackson, but they all have about 250 rushing attempts while Jackson has only about 150!

If ol’ Casey were alive, he’d say “amazin’.”

Of course, none of last night’s accomplishments will count in the record books because the rules require the achievements to take place against a professional team, and he was playing the Jets. Hell, I give the Jets credit. They did show up for the game. Heaven knows why. They’d have been better off taking the forfeit and resting up.

The Ravens continue to be the hottest team in the league. That makes ten wins in a row. They have clinched their division, and seem to be on their way to the AFC home field advantage. (They are the only 2-loss team at the moment.)

Defeated Kentucky governor pardoned violent criminals in a lame-duck spree

Scoop, ... 7 comments.

The complete “list includes a man convicted of reckless homicide, a convicted child rapist, a man who murdered his parents at age 16 and a woman who threw her newborn in the trash after giving birth in a flea market outhouse.”

One (particularly egregious and obviously corrupt) example:

Patrick Brian “Baker was convicted in 2017 of reckless homicide, robbery, impersonating a peace officer and tampering with evidence for his role in a 2014 home invasion that resulted in the death of Donald Mills. Baker had served just two years of his 19-year sentence when Bevin pardoned him to time served on Dec. 6.”

I’m guessing that the people who testified against him may not be happy to see him on the streets again.

Why would anyone free such a man so soon after such major crimes? I dunno. I guess it’s just a coincidence that Baker’s brother hosted a fundraiser for the lame-duck governor and donated to him over the years.