The new ‘rasslers may be bigger stars and better actors, and the sport is now filled with beautiful women, but nobody has come along to replace Heenan, Ventura and Piper for pure dark humor.
Some samples:
Gorilla : (Referring to a wrestler’s pet parrot) “Those birds can live to be twenty-five or thirty years old”
Brain : “Not in my house. If he was in my house he’d be in a shake ‘n’ bake bag; do you like your parrots original or extra crispy?”
Brain: “The two things that scare me most about wrestling fans is that they’re allowed to vote and allowed to reproduce.”
Gorilla: “Paul Bearer always has that eerie smell of fromaldehyde”
Brain: “I thought that was your cologne”
Brain To Bob Uecker: “You received 7,000 votes to get into the Hall Of Fame. You’d have gotten a lot more, but you ran out of stamps.”
Ross: “Back in Oklahoma, Bobby, we called a match like this a slobberknocker.”
Brain: “I thought that’s what they called the waitress at the Tip Top cafe in Downtown Tulsa.”
Brain: “Now remember this, when a man sticks his hand out to you, you shake it. Then kick him really hard when he’s not looking.”
Jim Ross: “You want to take the easy way out in everything in your life?”
Brain: “You gotta take the easy way out, this is life! Remember, a friend in need is a pest.”
Brain: “I’d love to see a midget battle royale, throw your man over the bottom rope”
Brain: (Regarding William “The Refrigerator” Perry) “The last time I saw ‘The Refrigerator’ move like that was when they opened the buffet line!”
Remember when many major cities had their own world wraslin’ champion. ✔ 😛 Those were the days lol. And Miss Elizabeth was the only babe! Things change. Digressing …
It’s Ariba McEntire!