At press time, reports confirmed Trump had accidentally deployed Herbie Hancock to the border.
President Donald Trump was reportedly unable to focus in a national security meeting Friday, distracted by the pressure of booking the Kennedy Center’s upcoming Summer Jazz Series. According to sources, the sound of his Cabinet members’ voices was essentially white noise to the otherwise preoccupied commander-in-chief, who was struggling to decide whether free jazz, hot jazz, or jazz fusion would make a better theme for the month of July.
I hope Trump does get distracted by trivia. When he deals with major issues, the results are uniformly awful.
Lara Trump set to bring her one-woman Tom Petty Tribute Show to the Center
…which The Kennedy will bill as ‘Free Jazz, With A Rebate’.
It’s sad that I was unsure if this would be an article from The Onion.